Dec. 1st, 2014 05:31 pm
fayanora: Hermione not amused (Hermione not amused)
My sleep schedule has been very weird lately. Recently I was getting more sleep than usual, going to bed at hours odd for me. And now I've gotten maybe 4 hours of sleep since 4 AM. IE, I fell asleep at 4 AM, woke up around 8, couldn't get back to sleep. Was up a bit, then tried again later, no go. So I stayed up that time and went to Winco to do grocery shopping.

Around 3:30 PM got home, very tired, tried to sleep again. For a while, our upstairs neighbor was being noisy again as usual. But then he quieted down and I actually got relaxed enough to where I was almost asleep... only to be startled awake by my roommate laughing like a fucking hyena in the other room. I tried going back to sleep, but she kept laughing ever minute or so, until I finally had enough and opened the door to tell her to shut up.

So I tried again, only this time I couldn't relax. My stomach was in a nervous knot I couldn't untie, for some reason. Not sure how long I tried before giving up that time. I need sleep and the universe is not letting me have any. Fuck my life.

CPAP again

Dec. 22nd, 2013 06:38 pm
fayanora: SK avatar (Default)
I am getting used to my CPAP at last, and it is adapting to me as well. Two nights in a row I got at least 5 or 6 hours sleep on the CPAP. My only problem now is that I don't turn as much in my sleep as I used to, so I keep getting woken up by pain in my side from being on it for too long. Still can't sleep on my back because the seal leaks when I do. For the time being, I am just gonna go with two sleep sessions interrupted by an hour or two of wakefulness. It's more natural anyway.
fayanora: by lj user holdonbaby (Elle looks up)
The following was written the other day:

Back in 2012, and I think also back in 2011, I had sleep studies done to see if I had sleep apnea. They were ridiculously expensive and Medicare wouldn't pay for them. I had another one around the beginning of this year, too. I finally managed, though, to get the info I needed. My sleep doctor ordered a CPAP for me back in January, and Medicare told me I had to get yet another fucking sleep study they wouldn't pay for, before they would pay for the CPAP. Which is really stupid, because I had all the information already; my blood oxygen goes down to 70% without a CPAP, when I sleep.

But my coverage has changed since then. I got on a program that pays my Medicare premium for me, letting me keep an extra $100 per month (which came right in time! I would have had to move out if it hadn't!), and at the same time I had them increase it from A to A and B.

A month or two back, it occurred to me that there might be different rules now I had better coverage, so I checked with Medicare, and sure enough, they will pay for my CPAP. The only requirement now is I have a sleep study every 7 years. (Plenty of time to either cajole them into paying for it, or saving the money to pay for it myself.) So Dr. Hagen re-ordered the CPAP for me after I explained everything that had happened, and I got a call yesterday from the place that has them. I go in on Thursday to pick it up and get shown how to use it.

I also had to go to my shrink to get refills of my anti-depressant pills. While I was there, I asked about female hormones, since I had found you could get them in pill form. She referred me to Crystal at the same clinic, whose job is to look up stuff like whether Medicare will pay for stuff or not, like she did to find out about the CPAP for me. Crystal later called me back with a number to call. I called that number, and got instructions on how to begin. In order to see the people who are apparently the only people in Portland for hormone stuff (at least who take Medicare), I will have to change my Medicare to “Med Advantage” and my Medicaid (which I had not known I had at all) to “Family Plan,” before I could even come in to see them. Which, she said, would not entail any premium increases.

When I told Brooke about possibly getting on hormones, one of the things she said was to think about if I wanted to change my legal name. Which, I admit, has been a tricky issue for me for a long time. I started going by a shortened form of my Traipahni name (Fay from Fayanora Ahnabahn Tahlahmorgk) almost 15 years ago because no human names really clicked for me, not even the name I would have had if I had been born a genetic girl (Cassandra). For a while, I have wondered whether I would stick with my given name, or go with some form of my Traipahni name. I even considered “Fay-Anne Aura Arts.” I know I want to keep my last name; it is uncommon and it suits me, as I am an artist. I've never had an issue with my last name. My first name, yes, but not my surname. My only issue with going with something like “Fay-Anne” is becoming F. Arts rather than my current T. Arts.

I was thinking about it today, while signing a check, and had the sudden thought of “maybe I should keep my current initials at least.” Which led almost at once to another possibility: Tempest Alexandria Arts. (Inspired by Meriel Tempest, the name of Lyria's daughter.) The name instantly struck a chord that no other human name has before. So now I'm wondering, if I were to change my legal name (which I would like to do), if I should go with that. The only issue is, all my friends know me as Fay, even offline ones. So I've been thinking about things like Tempest Alexandria Fay Arts, Tempest Alexandria Fay-Anne Arts and the like.

But there's another possibility: I could change my legal name to Tempest Alexandria Arts and be known by two names, one human name and one shortened version of my Traipahni name (like I already am); be known both as Tempest and as Fay. (But never as “Tempy”; I associate that with Temperance Brennan of the TV show “Bones.”) This makes a lot of sense to me, since on Traipah the Ah'Koi Bahnis, at least in some cultures, tend to give their kids “nest names,” those kids later choosing an adult name for themselves, but still probably being known by friends and relatives by both names. Of course, with a cool name like Tempest, I wouldn't mind being called by either name.

But yeah, I really like Tempest as a name. It reflects the chaotic side of me, the powerful and wild Shao'Kehn side of me. And at the same time, keeping a feminized version of my given middle name honors my dad's choice of names for me, and the history behind it. (But I could never do the same for my first name; I dislike all versions of it, for myself.) Ha! And really, changing it from Alexander to Alexandria gives it a different historical meaning as well, referencing the Library at Alexandria. (No jokes from the peanut gallery!)

Okay, I've thought about it. Unless I think of something better, I really really like Tempest Alexandria Arts as a new legal name.

~ ~ ~

I went to Norco and got my CPAP today! My appointment was at 3. I got there at 2:30, the guy wasn't ready til about 10 or 15 minutes after 3, and it was almost 4:30 when we finished. It's a lot smaller than I thought it would be. The machine, the mask, the tube, the power supply, and a couple other things fit in a bag like a smallish camera bag.

The thing almost seems to read my mind. With the CPAP at the sleep study, I kept struggling because the thing would blow air in at a constant rate, which made it difficult for me to breathe; I kept having brief panic attacks and having to rip off the mask to breathe right. But this one is awesome! This one pumps more air in when I inhale. There's air going in all the time, just more when I need it. And it's so LIGHT! I barely felt it. I almost fell asleep in the chair while using it there, even though there was no water in the humidifier.
fayanora: SK avatar (Default)
For a long time, I've wondered if I have Non-24 sleep disorder. I don't actually know much about it, so it's idle speculation on my part, but I do have a number of sleep oddities, even if you don't count my sleep apnea.

I remember when I was young, I'd be gotten up at 7 PM and wouldn't get to sleep until midnight. When my sleep schedule is regular, I'm up for 17 hours and sleep for eight. My sleep apnea has been getting worse lately, and fucking things up, but 17/8 is my usual sleep pattern.

Earlier today I had a bit of a minor epiphany. I remembered that on Traipah, they have a 25 hour day. And, since their planet doesn't wobble on its axis like ours does, there are no seasons as we know them. Also, because of the no-wobble thing, all year round they have 17 hours of daylight and 8 hours of night.

17/8! The same as my sleep schedule, when it's behaving. O_O I have a Traipahni sleep pattern!
fayanora: SK avatar (Default)
So I went in to OHSU today to the sleep studies department for my appointment. It was the follow-up appointment I was supposed to have months ago, that I didn't go to the first time because they told me Medicare would cover the sleep study, then sent me a bill for $2000.

I found out that during the sleep study, they'd found I have severe sleep apnea. My blood oxygen level was going down to 78%, and they also found out that the sleep apnea was waking me up 30 times an hour!

Naturally, because of what happened before, when the doctor said I needed another sleep study, this time with a CPAP, I told him what happened last time, that Mom had needed to pay the bill for me, and so I was wary of getting trapped into another ridiculous bill. He said he couldn't think why Medicare hadn't covered it, that they were supposed to, and then told me to get in touch with both the billing department and Medicare itself. I'll need to find a phone I can spend an hour on hold with, to do the Medicare call. But anyway, the sleep study isn't until March, so I have plenty of time to make damn sure I won't be hit with another bill. And if I am, this time I'll know to contest it.

But with as severe as my sleep apnea is, I really hope to get a CPAP. He said that Medicare will pay for the equipment and accessories, as long as I use it all night, every night.

Oh, and the weird tongue spasms and mouth spasm I was having a few days ago for a number of nights is apparently caused by sleep apnea as well. He said people usually don't notice it because it usually only happens when one is already asleep. Luckily, I didn't have any tongue/mouth spasms or the feeling that my tongue had gotten burned, or any other weird shit last night. (And no strange disembodied voices!)

Well, more later as it happens.
fayanora: Djyahlah (Djyahlah)
Okay, I know part of my sleeping habits being weird is my being nocturnal, but I think there's more to it. I'm starting to wonder if my Otherkin-ness is to blame, at least partially. Traipah has longer days than nights, I forget how much longer. But I think Traipahni days are around twice as long as their nights. At the very least, their planet doesn't wobble on its axis like Earth does, and so they have one season all year long, and no changes in how long their days and nights are. (NO DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME, EITHER!!!)

Now, whether this is a soul influence or just psychosomatic, I dunno. But I do think it's an influence. Hell, if my having two inner children in here can physically manifest as my body trying to smell like the clean, earthy scent of children AND the more fragrant adult smell, and succeeding at neither (true fact!), then it makes sense that having two aliens in my head (three, if you count Shao'Kehn) from a planet with long days and short nights would have an effect on me.

But sometimes it's just weird. Took 1 5mg dose of melatonin last night, it did nothing at all. I took 2 doses at midnight, and it made me sleepy for a while, then I stopped being sleepy, and now I'm starting to get sleepy again.
fayanora: Steph Pensive (Steph Pensive)
Last night, I wasn't even the slightest bit tired. My sleep schedule had been a bit off from what I wanted it to be anyway, so I decided to try "cycling around" again. Thus, I stayed up and on the computer until about 11 AM. Shut the computer off and went on my monthly grocery run to WinCo. By the time I got back, it was 3 PM. I finished putting things away about 3:15 and went straight to bed, I was so tired. Then I woke up at 20 minutes till 3 AM. This is going to be interesting.

What I hope to do is stay up until 9 or 10 PM and go to bed then, waking up at 7 or 8 AM.
fayanora: Steph Sleepy (Steph Sleepy)
My sleep schedule has been such a mess that I've been trying, for the last few days, to reset it. But I keep staying up too late (well past 4 AM, sometimes as late as 8 AM) from either computer or reading or both. Last night I managed to get to sleep around 6 AM and tried waking up at 1 PM. Managed it, but had to cancel my plans to go to Panera to do some writing because I felt groggy as hell and not very pleased. I stayed up a few hours before a headache started to form, which is when I said "Fuck it," took some pain reliever, and laid down again. Slept from around 4 PM til 40 after 6. Gods, this sucks. Why can't the world be on *my* schedule, or everything open 24/7? If I didn't have to worry about when things were open, I'd let my sleep schedule do whatever the fuck it wants.
fayanora: Steph phone (Steph phone)
Most nights, I cannot seem to get *enough* sleep. And then there are these randomly occurring nights wherein time goes at a bizarrely slow rate. Last night was one of those. I think it was around 4 AM when I got to sleep (it was something like 3:15 or 3:30 when I went to bed), but by 9 AM I woke up on my own and had to resist the strong impulse to stay up because some odd part of me AND my body seemed to think it was 1 PM already. But it wasn't, and I could not possibly have gotten enough sleep in 5 hours. So I rolled over and went back to sleep. Kept waking up partly now and then with the same thing going on, my mind and a slight... not an ache, really... in my back telling me I'd been in bed too long. With my rational part of my brain saying, "Fuck you both, you're wrong. Now shut the fuck up." Then going back to sleep.

I don't know what was up with that shite. Maybe there was a time dilation field in my bed all night long? Bleh.

Sure, I'd taken an hour nap from 8PM to 9PM the night before, but I doubt that had anything to do with it. There was nothing unusual about that, aside from the fact I napped for exactly an hour without even setting an alarm. Very odd indeed.


Feb. 15th, 2010 06:38 pm
fayanora: SK avatar (Default)
I read recently about a sleep schedule called Uberman. What you do is take 20 minute naps every 4 hours, and not much longer than that. They say that at first, you will feel like crap while you get adjusted to the schedule, but finally your brain gives up and goes with it, and instead of waiting to go into REM sleep (the kind of sleep that makes you feel rested and refreshed), it starts going straight into REM sleep. Most people on ordinary sleep schedules only get about an hour and a half of REM sleep each night. With Uberman, once you get used to it, you end up having 2 hours of REM sleep every day. You only get 2 hours of sleep, period, under this system, but it ends up being all REM sleep.

Since I sleep over 8 hours a night usually and almost never feel really rested, I'm considering trying this out. Especially since I have a tendency anyway of dreaming during naps, and almost never have a nap longer than 40 minutes. Also, it seems to me that cats already do something like this.


Jul. 13th, 2009 03:41 pm
fayanora: Steph Sleepy (Steph Sleepy)
Had to go to bed early last night to be up in time to go to this "open interview" thing today. I ended up waiting a shitload times longer than the interview itself. There's going to be more interviews. I sure hope they hire me, or my bank account is going to be very grumpy at me, as it's downtown and requires bus or MAX to get to.

My sleep last night was fitful. Kept waking up, couldn't get back to sleep all the way. Got woken up at one point by the worst acid reflux I've ever had. Took tums, pepto, AND Prilosec. Then an hour or two later got woken up by gas pains. I think my body hates me.

Couldn't get all the way back to sleep. Between worrying about possibly having sleep apnea and my mind refusing to shut the fuck up no matter how hard I tried, and my body doing crazy painful things, it's no wonder I am very tired today.

And then of course I think I finally did manage to get to sleep all the way for about 10 or 15 minutes when the damned alarm went off. I think it's time to shell out for a sleep aid, maybe one of those things that helps you get to sleep quickly and stay asleep. You know, with time-release pills?

I don't think I ever even got enough sleep at any point to dream at all. I hate this shit. I wonder if summer has anything to do with this, because I don't remember my sleep problems being anywhere near this bad in the winter.

I'm gonna take a nap when I'm done with shit today. Which won't be right away. I have to go to Freddy's later. Got cans and bottles to cash in, and need a couple cans of black beans.
fayanora: Steph Sleepy (Steph Sleepy)
I think I might have some kind of sleep problem. It takes me forever to get to bed, and forever to wake up in the morning. Without any other impetus, I sleep well past the point when my body starts to complain, and end up with neckaches and headaches. I toss and turn at night, and I constantly have these half-awake dreams. I kept waking up last night, as well.

A few days ago I only got a few hours of sleep for two days in a row, and my stomach got all sour at me, a pattern I know well from when I used to have to get up early in the morning. One night like that is usually not a problem, but two in a row seems to trigger some stomach alarm and I go half the day with a sour stomach. Long ago realized that eating anyway just made it worse, so then halfway through the day it morphs into painful hunger.

On top of that, I have to actually physically get out of bed to wake up. I experimented with taking the blindfold thingy off in the morning, but I just end up sleeping with the sun in my eyes that way, which turns my dreams even weirder than normal.

I was having problems with my sleep back in Iowa, but it's been getting progressively worse since moving to Oregon. I dunno if it's stress or what, but I'm getting very tired of it, pardon the pun.


fayanora: SK avatar (Default)
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